Friendships & Epilepsy

Like others without epilepsy, we deserve the same acceptance they receive in workplaces or schools and especially in friendships. Disclosing your epilepsy diagnosis to a new acquaintance or friend is like wearing your heart on your sleeve; it can make you feel vulnerable and scared. Some people may not think much about it, but others have given me responses such as 'I'm so sorry that happened to you' or 'Oh, wow, I don't know what to say.' I am okay with these types of reactions because, to be honest, there is no perfect response when someone tells you that they have a chronic illness such as epilepsy. However, it can be an issue if they begin to treat you differently due to it. At the end of the day, we are all human beings.  

The word 'lazy' has had a bad reputation in my vocabulary for nearly a decade. Many people outside the epilepsy community don't understand that medications, auras, and seizures make us tired, not 'lazy.' So, what does all of this have to do with friendships? It means that we need to find friends who do their best to try and help us, even at our lowest. To me, a true friend is someone who learns basic seizure first aid for you, makes sure you take your medication when you are with them, and respects your decision to stay at home when you aren't feeling well. These are not enormous demands to ask from a friend because if they truly are your friend, they must care about your health and wellbeing. 

Perhaps I got lucky making new friends, all of who know first aid, and check up on me after a seizure. Rather than dragging me out on days filled with auras, they come to visit me instead. Most importantly, they accept that I have epilepsy and treat me just like they would any other person. Making friends and managing your epilepsy can be challenging but not impossible. We all deserve meaningful friends who accept you as you are. 

-TGWE