Why it’s not cool to joke about disabilities you don’t have
An Opinion Piece Written by Trevor Harris
My name is Trevor “Patch” Harris & I’m a struggling standup in the L.A. area with hemiplegia Cerebral Palsy, epilepsy & hydrocephalus from a stroke in the womb. I developed chronic pain from corrective shunt surgeries after my body crashed from the trauma two months shy of my 14th birthday. After 3 years of ketamine treatment due to being in a minimal vegetative state due to widespread chronic pain, I started walking again and my pain management doctor suggested I try standup comedy as a chronic pain management tool now that I’m back to the world.
I moved to Austin on my doctor’s recommendation at 18 and it was a wild mix of wanting to get better at a craft & staying in bed due to widespread chronic pain. As I was getting used to the stage, I was in and out of the ER for massive flare ups and other comics didn’t know what to do except to hang out with me. I remember one particular set where I got off stage and a guy approached me asking why I didn’t do any holocaust jokes. I was shocked beyond belief and told him that I’m a leprechaun of which were neutral in WW2. But, mentioned that he was right to ask as disabled people were the prototype for the gas chambers. I remember two other specific nights where I was doing shows about Cerebral Palsy & chronic pain & remember a couple women specifically on two separate occasions tell me they’d “rather be pregnant again than be in my body.”. That was the one time I couldn’t respond to any audience members. It was always a good time. But, since I don’t drink due to my epilepsy, it was one of the factors in deciding to move back to L.A. to continue the journey.
5 years had passed and I had my first seizure in a decade & 3 months the week after Thanksgiving in 2019 while finishing up leftovers. I felt this intense pressure like a helmet you can’t take off, I screamed for my mom, and flopped till the EMT arrived. I had the worst migraine I ever remember experiencing. There are regular migraines. But, so much goes on in your head during seizures that those feel that much worse. The assistant ER doc had said that Keppra I was on for a decade & 3 months finally died. I didn’t know that you could tolerate an entire medication even though I seized as a kid from med tolerance. We just took it as a sign that I needed to increase my dosage. This was a different scenario since I was 27 at the time & fully biologically grown.
After I had the seizure, we thought I was okay. Fast forward to February 2020 2 weeks after Kobe Bryant died, I had my second seizure in 2 months and my doctor started throwing new meds at me without an EEG first because my seizures were pretty consistent. Grand mals/Tonic Clonics were every so often with focals 20x every day that felt like giant singular shocks in various parts of my body. 2021 hits and my generalized seizures started like clockwork every two weeks with the same amount of focals. I could be eating or watching a movie and boom!
My doctors were connected to my hip like an ideal partner that doesn’t leave just because I ended up in the ER. Months pass & I’m still in & out of the ER every two weeks like clockwork due to the seizures so often that the EMTs remembered my name! The last time I remember going to the ER, the main ER doc comes in annoyed telling me that there’s nothing they can do, all they can do is let me rest up and for me to in his words, “Get over your seizures like Julius Caesar did!”. It was after that, I received the rescue nasal spray to stop the seizures and I’m happy to report that I’ve been ER trip free for nearly 4 years now!
I had an EEG done Thanksgiving 2021, got my new medication called Briviact which works like Keppra & unfortunately had 8 more months of seizures as we were tweaking the dosage. After 2 1/2 years off stage, I was CLEARED to perform again with my new seizure meds & rescue nasal spray in hand September 2022! My first show was in Vegas during my birthday week in November.
This is the part where I say PLEASE don’t joke about seizures or other disabilities/suggest cures unless you have them because it’s HIGHLY insensitive!
I seized for nearly 3 years straight & that’s what I focused my sets on. After my first couple shows, I had dudes suggest I drop my meds for weed because *that’s* what’ll work. There was also a guy who suggested a “Japanese water cure” where I’d pour boiling water on my head to stop seizures. I had a woman come up to me who told me she felt sorry for me because her dog has seizures. Like, thanks! But, we’re different spieces. Another woman told me that I was funny and wanted to pleasure me so well that I’d have a GIANT generalized seizure that would cure everything. I nervously laughed and informed her what she’s describing is called Status Epilepticus and wouldn’t stop unless my nasal spray was administered. There was even a woman I had to inform that I couldn’t go home with her because I have reflex seizures as an adult that evolved from my hyperacusis auditory sensitivities from Cerebral Palsy as a kid. Basically, if we made noises too loud for my brain, I might seize. It’s why I eat outside when out & keep it as quiet as possible off stage.
Now we’re at the GOOD PART! Eventually, I went on my very first tour in 2023 after having a breakthrough seizure after 7 months and 3 weeks seizure free that April. I decided to see where I had couches & made it all the way to Denver where I recorded my first album for a private event where a chunk of the crowd KNEW SEIZURE FIRST AID! While I was traveling extensively, I noticed how kind strangers were as I communicated my needs with Cerebral Palsy like as a kid & my seizure rescue meds notifying bartenders, flight attendants and friends. No one was afraid of a seizure possibility like lots are. I reached Vegas again for my birthday and was informed that a comic friend had known what to do about an audience member who seized DURING his show due to my jokes. That’s why I ALWAYS talk about it because it’s dangerous and can happen at any time. Remember to not joke about stuff unless you have it and be kind!
Here’s all my links: